White House sources confirmed late last night that the President, following a spirited game of golf and a triple cheeseburger, issued an urgent plea for global amnesia concerning a recent post about the Strait of Hormuz. Officials admitted they are unsure exactly what the tweet *said*, but universally agreed that it’s best if everyone just forgets it.

The request, delivered via an oddly punctuated press release, stated: "The United States, under my tremendous leadership, urges the ENTIRE WORLD to pretend that absolutely NOTHING regarding the Strait of Hormuz has been mentioned. EVER. It's fine. Believe me." Senior advisors have reportedly hidden all Sharpies and maps of the Middle East from the Oval Office.

The incident has sent ripples of confusion through international diplomatic circles. Iran's Foreign Minister, Javad Zarif, responded with a single, emoji-laden tweet: " 🤔🤷‍♂️👍", while the British Foreign Office issued a statement saying they were 'too busy dealing with Brexit to deal with… whatever THIS is.'

Even Fox News anchors seemed perplexed, switching mid-sentence from praising Trump's "bold stance" to urging viewers to "change the channel, quickly! Look, puppies!"

**What They Don't Want You To Know:** Trump's initial tweet reportedly contained a misspelled threat to impose sanctions on anyone using the Strait of Hormuz, followed by a recipe for 'the BEST chocolate cake EVER (very serious).'

Closing kicker: Asked for comment, a White House janitor muttered, "Honestly, this is Tuesday."