Sources within the Metropolitan Police have confirmed that officers were called to Horseferry Road in Westminster following reports of a 'levitating infant.' Initial reports suggested the child 'fell upwards' from a considerable height, defying all known laws of physics.

Eyewitnesses described a scene of utter disbelief, with one local resident, Agnes Plumtree, 74, stating, 'I saw it with my own eyes! The little darling just floated down like a feather. It was the most beautiful thing I've ever seen, far better than that corgi parade down the mall last month!' Another onlooker, Barry Chumley, 32, added, 'The coppers looked proper gobsmacked. One of them even tried to catch the kid with a blanket, but it just sort of…bounced off the baby's aura.'

The baby, identified only as 'Beatrice' by attending paramedics, was found to be in perfect health, showing no signs of distress or injury. In fact, sources say Beatrice was observed 'giggling uncontrollably' throughout the ordeal. A spokesperson for Great Ormond Street Hospital stated, 'We have conducted a full medical examination and can confirm that Beatrice is, medically speaking, utterly unremarkable. Except, of course, for the whole defying gravity thing.'

**What They Don't Want You To Know:** Independent investigations reveal that the building in question has recently been fitted with new, energy-efficient windows designed to minimize drafts, possibly creating localized updrafts. However, experts remain puzzled as to how such weak air currents could have elevated a baby.

Adding to the mystery, reports are circulating of other strange occurrences in the area, including pigeons flying backwards and squirrels spontaneously tap-dancing. The Met Police have declined to comment on these reports, stating only that they are 'monitoring the situation closely.'